SOUNDTRACK: RHEOSTATICS-Static Journey 1980-2007 (2008).

I just stumbled upon this awesome site for Rheostatics fans.  Although I’m unclear who exactly runs this awesome repository of Rheostatics wonderment (oh wait, according to the Rheostatics own page, his name is Darrin Cappe).

The Static Box is a FREE 9-volume downloadable collection of all manner of Rheostatics audio: early recordings, interviews, live recordings, studio recordings, demos, everything.  I downloaded the whole shebang and it fit onto 11 CDs.

The site also has a ton of videos (including a downloadable concert from Massey Hall.

I haven’t listened to the whole thing yet (I think it clocks in around 14 hours).  But what I’ve heard is great.  The sound quality is very good (even from the older cassette demos), and the comprehensiveness of the undertaking is amazing.  If you’re a longtime fan or even just a causal listener, the amount of stuff here will be more than enough to keep you busy.

As I go through the discs I’ll post some comments about them all.

[READ: December 22, 2009] Maintenance Volume 2

Volume 2 of the series is not very different from Volume 1, and that’s a good thing.  TerroMax, Inc is still the world biggest evil think tank!  The jokes are still pop culturey (and often quite gross).  The art is very fun and conveys the action perfectly.  And, there’s still a lot of mad scientists on the loose!

This volume collects issues 4-6.  Issues 4 & 5 are a two-part story called, indeed, “Fantastic Sewage.”  The premise is that one of the mad scientists has created killer nanobots which have disobeyed him.  So he flushed them.  Where they thrived!  And our heroes are shrunken down and flushed into the sewers to find/fight them.  Yup, “ew.”  But a very funny “ew.”  You’ll never look at poop the same way again (if you ever bothered to look at it before, of course).

The second story is a self-contained one in which the TerroMax, Inc heater is on the fritz.  But Doug and Manny can’t fix it because they must attend the first annual meeting about Employee Morale (which of course is pretty low).  The delightful thing about this is that the entire cast is represented in the scene and the crazy (but deadly) creature that escapes interacts with a lot of them.  The plot is thin, but it’s great to see so many of the supporting cast.

There’s also a bonus strip. It’s only a page, but it’s even more Doug and Manny!

I’m really enjoying this series an am looking forward to Volume 3.

SOUNDTRACK: RHEOSTATICS-Melville (1991).

This fantastic Rheostatics album was one of the last ones I bought for some reason.  It came after their debut, Greatest Hits, and is quite a departure for that more simplistic disc.

It opens with the two minute “Record Body Count,” which sets the tone for the disc.  It’s quirky, with different pacings and loud/soft parts, and is quite affecting.  In fact, the entire rest of the disc is quirky and off beat, as befits a disc with a big whale on the cover.

Three great tracks on this disc are “Saskatchewan,” “Horses” and “Aliens (Christmas 1988).”  And the CD comes with a bonus track of their cover of “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” which is rocking and swaying as a good nautical track should.

The CD ends with “You Are Very Star” a track that ended their live shows.  On the disc, the track is a series of hockey announcements with quiet whistles as the song fades away,

Rheostatics are definitely an unusual band.  Martin Tielli’s voice goes into high registers at unexpected times, he also sing-speaks (and you can hear the Canadian accent) at times.  Tim Vesely and Dave Bidini also have vocal duties, and their more mellow style adds for a nice contrast.  But basically, what you get is unpredictable rock.  And really, there’s nothing better than that.  Especially when, once you get comfortable with the songs, you realize just how catchy they are.

Melville, it’s in Saskatchewan, and it rocks.

[READ: December 21, 2009] Salt Water Taffy: The Legend of Old Salty

This is a delightful all ages comic set on the coast of Maine.  As the story opens we see brothers Jack and Benny (I did wonder if there is some connection to Jack Benny, but I’d have to say no) driving to their summer house in Maine.  Benny is younger and having fun playing the license plate game while Jack is absorbed in his gameboy.

When they arrive, the kids run around the house investigating this and that (I loved the drawings of the kids stomping around), only to discover that there’s no TV!  Their dad is a writer and wants solitude, so they are shut off from all fun!  That is, until they meet Angus, an old sea dog who tells them the Legend of Old Salty, a gigantic lobster with whom Angus himself has had a very nasty encounter.

The rest of the story concerns Benny & Jack helping Angus track down Old Salty (and, of course, salt water taffy).  There is some absurd humor (wait till you see the seagulls) and anthropomorphic lobsters.  The art is fun: thick lines, very cartoony and exaggerated accentuating its frenetic pace. The story is appropriate for kids of all ages, and is very entertaining.

There are at least two more Salt Water Taffy stories currently in print.  And I’m looking forward to them both.

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Kiss (1974).

I’ve always loved the first Kiss record.  Everything about it is over the top, and I can’t imagine what people thought of it when it hit shelves back in 1974.

And yet, for such a preposterous looking record, the tracks are really great.  The music is a mixture of pop, Rolling Stones rock swagger, Beatles harmonies, and a sort of proto-heavy metal.

“Strutter” proves to be a great opening track with a great riff and fun vocals.  And it’s just one of thousands of Kiss songs about hot chicks that, because of its metaphorical/obscure lyrics is less offensive than it might have been.  “Nothin’ to Lose” is another lyrically inscrutable song that I’ve always assumed was very dirty: “Before I had a baby, I tried every way.  I thought about the back door.  Didn’t know what to say.”  And yet it is so outrageously poppy that no one minds singing along.  “Firehouse” is a wonderfully over the top song with great falsetto vocals and an awesome solo from Ace. “Cold Gin”  is another rocking classic with cool basswork and guitar solo notes over a standard rocking verse.  Side one ends with”Let Me Know” a pop song hiding under the guise of a heavy rock song.  The song is such a poppy bit of fluff (check out the soulful harmonies before the ending guitar solo kicks in), but it works wonders.

Side Two starts with a silly cover of “Kissin’ Time” that of course is appropriate for this band (and if they went for a more poppy sound overall, this would have been their anthem, no doubt).  “Deuce” follows, and it blasts forth with some heavy stuttering and slighty off-sounding guitars.  It also has the best opening lyric ever: “Get up and get your grandma out of here.” Which is later followed by one of the top ten Huh? choruses off all time, “You know your man is working hard, he’s worth a deuce.”  (Rampant speculation as to what a “deuce” was in 1974 can be found online).  I’ve always loved the ”Love Theme from Kiss” which is possibly the most hated pre-disco Kiss song that I can think of.  It’s a weird pseudo-middle-eastern instrumental that I’ve always thought was trippy and funny.  And then comes “100,000 Years,” another one of my favorite songs.  Again, the lyrics are just bizarre (and I’ve always mis-heard them until I looked them up just now: “How could you have waited so long, it must have been a bitch while I was gone” (I’d always thought the “it” was actually “you” which means the song isn’t as nasty as I ‘d always thought).  So, it’s sort of like The Odyssey, then.  But musically the song is just phenomenal: a great guitar riff over simple bass notes and a staggering guitar solo.

The disc ends with the outstanding “Black Diamond.”  There’s so much to love about this song.  It’s a gritty tale about life on the streets.  It opens with a pretty acoustic guitar ballad sung by Paul.  Then, after the awesome “Hit it!” the song kicks in powerfully.  Peter takes over vocals, and his rough voice works perfectly.  It’s only five minutes long, but it feels like a great epic track.  No the least of which is because the song ends with a cool concept: a single note, punctuated with drums, that is slowed down (from the original taped master), getting slower and slower making the notes sound heavier and heavier, slower and slower.  You can even hear the drum riff played at a by-now snail pace.  It’s very cool.

This is really a great album, and it’s somewhat overshadowed by their mid 70’s more famous music.  And if you like 70s rock but don’t think you like Kiss, this is one disc you can sneak into your collection.

[READ: December 20, 2009] The New Sins

I’m not entirely sure what to make of this.  I bought it from McSweeney’s in their attic sale for a couple of bucks.  David Byrne is Talking Heads David Byrne, so everything he makes is arty, avant garde and hard to fathom on a first listen/view.  But I’m unlikely to read this again, so he gets a cursory attempt here.

The New Sins purports to be a collection of what the “new” sins are.  It’s also written as if it were an ancient text that was recently uncovered and translated into English (although obviously, the word choices are laughably not ancient (web design, for instance).  Basically, what you get is a list of behaviors that until recently were not sins but which are now.  The odd thing about the book is that the sins are not an obvious parody of virtues or anything like that.  He doesn’t just say that kindness is a sin, he adds that ambition is a sin as well.  So it’s not even simple inversion.

As such, it comes off as parts criticism, humor, and misanthropy.  I’m not sure how effective it is at any of them.  There are a few dry funny things, but the interesting thing is that the book is designed as a pocket Bible.  Its cover looks like one, and inside it has red words and lots and lots of pictures (that I believe Byrne took, and Dave Eggers had a hand with).  That led me to think it would be a direct Bible joke.  But it isn’t.  It’s a peculiar work, to be sure.

It’s also bilingual.  That’s right, flip it over and read it the other way and it is all in Spanish.  (I did a very loose translation of a few pages and it is a legitimate translation, not a funny or silly one or anything).  But the pictures that fill the book (and which “accompany” the text) are different in the English and Spanish sides.

And it’s really short too.  About 100 pages per side with a picture on every other page.

I’ve no idea who the target market for this was. I’ve resisted a lot of Byrne’s print work because it seemed like it would be just like this.  So, at least I confirmed my suspicion.

SOUNDTRACK: The Believer July/August 2008 Music Issue Compilation CD: The Volatile But Symbiotic Relationship of Mabel and Anabel (2008).

The previous Believer CD expanded the palette of music by introducing a lot of hard-edged bands.  But this CD smashes any complaints about one-dimensionality.  It is designed around a concept of “world” music which they have designated as MABEL (Musicians of American, British, or [Western] European Lineage) and ANABEL (Artists Not of American, British, or [Western] European Lineage).

The internet has introduced a huge amount of ANABEL music to MABEL musicians.  And this has led to Western musicians experimenting with very different musical styles.

The problem, such as it is, with this disc is that it is comprised almost entirely of ANABEL songs.  So, although the disc is designed to show the influences of these artists there’s not a whole lot of tracks that show the western bands using them.  (In fairness, you can only do so much with 72 minutes).  And yes, there are a number of clearly MABEL artists here: Animal Collective, Dirty Projectors.

However, as an introduction to a few cultures’ worth of music, it’s pretty great.  I admit that I don’t love every song on this disc.  But after a few listens I’ve really grown to appreciate these tracks from Iran, Jamaica (dancehall), India and Bulgaria.

Some artists that really impressed me were: Googoosh, and her traditional Iranian track from the 70s.  Enemble Pirin, a subset of the Le Mysterè des Voix Bulgares (whom I’ve liked for years).  And Beat Konducta.  It also introduced me to Aceyalone, who I’ve heard of but never listened to.  And I really enjoyed the superfast rapping in the start of Busy Signal’s track.

I wouldn’t listen to this disc a lot, but it would be fun to throw a track or two from this on a mix CD and see how well it fit.

The track listing is here.

[READ: December 15, 2009] Shenanigans

I usually really enjoy the slice of life/romancey comics from Oni Press.  But I have some major gripes with this one.

The art is pretty cool.  I’m intrigued by the fact that the pupils of the characters are white (like L i’l Orphan Annie).  I found it very disconcerting at first, but once I got used to it, I rather liked it.  And the characters were always very expressive.

It’s the story that I have a problem with.

The story is an overly simple–cliched, if you will–story about a man who poses as another man to check up on his girlfriend.  Holden is a thoroughly unlikable character. When the story opens he is kicked out of his girlfriend’s apartment for ignoring her (while playing video games).  And, frankly he never proves himself to be anything better than the loser she describes him as.

Soon thereafter he meets and woos Casey, a beautiful woman who deserves much much better than him.  Inexplicably, she invites him to live with her, even though she was just fired from her job and she already has a roommate–I guess a freeloading guy seems like a good addition to the mix.  But Casey is very smart (although not smart enough to dump Holden) and she posts an ad that she’s offering her services as a math tutor.

Because she’s hot, she gets many takers.  This consumes most of her time and, of course, Holden becomes jealous, because who wouldn’t hate to hate his girlfriend earning cash?  And when he sees that the tutees are college hunks (but really, who else needs tutoring in math?) he gets enraged (see, why isn’t she dumping his lame ass by now?).  Even though he see her rebuffing their advances, he gets very jealous and hatches a bad TV plot to disguise himself from her.  Now, as with any preposterous story, somehow a hat, glasses and a fake goatee are enough to fool this woman who claims to love Holden so very much.

And, of course, later they end up at the same event where hijinks ensue.

I was really disappointed that nothing original happened here.  And, worst of all, Holden is such an unlikable character, it’s shocking to think that any woman would give him as many chances as she does.  Oh, and the whole subplot of her twin brother who thoroughly abuses her best friend (he even inadvertently sets her on fire) is never given any backstory or resolution.

It’s a very poor addition to any graphic novel collection.

SOUNDTRACK: THE FEELIES-Only Life (1988).

The Feelies were based out of Haledon, NJ, a town not more than fifteen minutes from my house.  I’ve always felt this weird association to them.  One day a coworker drove me past one of the band members’ houses when I worked in North Haledon (in retrospect this was probably bullshit).

It was this album that introduced me to them.  Prior to the internet, it wasn’t always easy to find out how many albums a band had out, so I assumed this was their first.  I’d assumed that we were close in age and that I could have run into them at any local club or hangout.  Well, it turned out that this was their third and their first came out in 1980.  When I was 11.  So, clearly  there is absolutely no way we were peers.

Somehow, when I first heard The Feelies, I had not been exposed to The Velvet Underground (what?).  So, when I heard them, it didn’t occur to me to say, “Hey that guy sounds just like Lou Reed.”  And he does.  Almost uncannily so on “It’s Only Life”.

But hey, get past that and you’ve got a really great jangly alterna-pop record from the late 80s.   While R.E.M. is sort of the master of the jangly pop song, there’s no real comparison here (okay, actually “Deep Fascination” could be mistaken for R.E.M. until the vocals kick in).  The biggest difference is tempo. The Feelies just kind of meander along at a calm and relaxed pace.  Not slow enough to be, god forbid, dull, but not exactly peppy either.

One thing I like about the band is that the bass and drums are always out in front.  The bass, in particular seems to really propel the songs (especially “Too Much”) which provides a great rhythmic feels and allows the guitars ample room to roam.

And the guitars do roam.  There are two guitars and they share soloing duties.  This soloing bit is rather a departure for college radio bands in the late 80s.  So, it definitely set them apart (as did the fact that there are like 30 words in each song).

The gorgeously simple yet very compelling “Higher Ground” is certainly a high point for the disc.  As is their cover of the Velvet’s “What Goes On.”

When I was a DJ in college, I randomly selected “Away” to play during a show (the first Feelies song I’d heard).  Even after twenty-one years it’s still as fresh and interesting.  It’s also rather different from the rest of the album.  It’s uptempo for one thing.  But it also starts with a cool slow guitar opening.  The song builds faster and faster and has a great sing along chorus.   The drums also sound wonderfully abrasive.  It’s really a great song and a great introduction to an underappreciated band.

[READ: November 22, 2009] Intermere

Following hot on the heels of Symzonia, I received Intermere through Inter Library Loan.  Intermere is even shorter (at 150 pages)!

What I liked about the story is that it removes all pretense as to the setting up of and the getting to the inner earth location.  As the story opens, our narrator, Giles Anderton, is pretty much immediately in massive trouble.  The boat he is on is about to sink and he is soon plunged headlong into the ocean.  (What an exciting opening!)

When he wakes up a short time later, he is on an island and is warmly greeted by a group of very short but very beautiful (ie, very pale) people.

From here, the book follows a track remarkably similar to Symzonia.  (In fact, there appears to be a whole subgenre of Hollow Earth fiction that is inspired by Symmes’ ideas).  The first real difference, and a neat twist, is that the Intermere people are telepathic.  They immediately determine where he is from (Central United States) and who his mother is.  This is significant because Anderton’s mother is about to learn that her son has been shipwrecked and that his foster brother (a convoluted plot point) has just been killed in the war.  This double dose of bad news will likely be too much for his mother.

Oh, what war you may ask?  Well, the Intermerians keep very strict tabs on the goings on in the outside world, so even though the world was at peace when Anderton left, in the six months since then, the Chinese Empire has gone to war with the West (!).  [I'm curious about the xenophobia here, but am not inclined to pursue it much; however, note this quote:

the 400,000 Chinese and affiliated races are more insidiously dangerous than you know. They will cultivate the seed now being sown and prepare the dragon's harvest of blood.

Jeez, what do you think was on Taylor's mind?].

They show Anderton that he can communicate with his mother telepathically to assure her that he will be alright and not to fret.  (She is relieved when she gets this transmission).  When he asks them about this technology, we get the best reply ever: Would people who didn’t understand the telephone ever imagine that you could talk to someone so far away through wires?  Of course, not, and so it is with you and our wireless communication.

It’s hard to beat that logic.

As Anderton is acclimatizing to this new land, he meets many of the VIPs of the nation.  He is first greeted by Xamas, the First Citizen.  And, as soon as we see “First Citizen,” we know what that means: a detailed explanation of the political make up of their world!  And like with Symzonia, only the best people are chosen to run the country.  But it is more democratic here: everyone is allowed to hold an office for one year, although you must, of course, be qualified; they consider it an honor and a duty and one for which they receive no extra money or honors.   After the year, they return to their previous life satisfied in a job well done.

This Utopian society is sort of socialist, although it is modified somewhat.   Everyone is allowed property (there are fascinating restrictions based on age) but they mostly work for the good of the community.  The one knock against equality is that only the men can own houses while their wives run them.

Oh, and of course, as we learn more about this sort of social structure, we learn about their currency (even the exchange rate with the dollar!), and blah blah taxation etc.

But it’s the science part that is quite fun.  Like Symzonia, there is awesome energy potential down here.  And the Intermerians are willing to explain some of it to him.  They basically have this egg shaped device that somehow channel the world’s natural electricity (if they told him any more he’d no doubt use it to try and take over the world, so we never learn how they harness all of this power).  With these eggs they can make cars that go 1,000 miles and hour, they (well, the wives) can heat food with no source of fire and they can use them for illumination as well. They also have 3 different vehicles, the medocar, the aerocar and the merocar

As he’s given a tour of the main city and the lesser surrounding cities, he is introduced to many more VIP’s: Karmas, the custodian of works and polity; Maros, the curator of scientific research and application; Alpaz, the curator of learning and progress and Remo, the curator of useful mechanical devices (because no one inside the earth would be named John, of course).

There’s even a discussion of religion.  The basic tenet down here is that religious sects are quite foolish.  As long as people bow to the one true God (who I am fairly certain means a Christian God), what difference does it make if they worship via Catholicism, Protestantism, “Hindooism” or even polytheism.  These Earthly sects have caused nothing but wars, not to mention countless lives lost in aggressive missionary work.  And if they all believe in a Supreme Being who cares how they worship Him?

Since I gave away part of the story of Symzonia, how can I resist comparing it?  [So, ahem, Spoiler]: In Intermere, our hero believes that he is going to be adopted by the people there and welcomed as an honorary member.  But of course, he cannot be (especially since they told his mother that he would be back soon).  And one morning he wakes up and finds himself in merocar, speeding back to the surface, until he arrives in…Singapore?.

He sells the merocar (at the telepathic recommendation of Remo) and eventually reunites with his mother.  The book abruptly ends with this passage:

I shall not describe the meeting with my mother nor speak of what was said in relation to the strange and brief communications which passed between us months before.

Well, okay.

So, in sum, Intermere is short on plot although it’s a bit more interesting than Symnzonia in its method of arriving inside the earth.

But, as I am learning with these Utopian stories, the people who live in these Utopias are kind of jerks.  They are very smug about their superiority, they show off all of the time, and they appear to have virtually no fun.  They don’t believe in any kind of finery, they don’t believe in dressing well or adorning themselves in anything.  They barely sleep and spend most of their time in contemplation.  Which may sounds ideal, but really, it sounds kind of awful.   There’s a great episode of Red Dwarf where the crew meets a holographic Utopian spaceship that sounds not unlike this bunch, and they all come off like a bunch of tossers.

I can’t help but wonder if people were offended by these Utopian stories when they were published.  Basically, here’s this guy airing his grievances about specific things that he hates with the country or religion or technology and claiming that these Utopians are vastly superior to us because they follow the lifestyle that the author thinks is awesome.

I have recently compiled a list of some 50 Hollow Earth-related stories.  I’ve half a mind to read all of them over the next few years or so (most are quite short which will be a nice change of pace).  But if they all follow this same format of Utopian politics and unworthy Externals, I may abort that goal.  One of the sources of Hollow Earth stories listed a number of stories that are different, ether more adventurous or even satirical, so I think those will be next.  Many of them are also free from Google Books, so I’ll look into that as well.

If you’re along for the Hollow Earth journey, welcome aboard!

SOUNDTRACK: KATE BUSH-The Red Shoes (1993).

The Red Shoes is something of a disappointment. While I enjoyed The Sensual World, it was definitely moving in a more adult contemporary vein.  The Red Shoes proceeds even further in this direction.  Since Kate is getting older, it makes sense that her music would change as well.

But there are some really fun tracks on here as well.  And Kate’s initial experiments with world music (the Bulgarian Choir) has really expanded into a more global palette (the island feel of “Eat the Music,” for instance).

The first four songs of the disc are really great.  They show an amazing diversity.  The first single “Rubberband Girl” is quite fun and bouncey.  It has a rather silly middle section where she makes rubberband-like sounds.   “And So is Love” sounds like classic Kate, with some wonderful vocals.  “Eat the Music” is a crazy, up beat horn fueled island track (with wonderfully suggestive lyrics).  And  “Moments of Pleasure” is a delightfully romantic song.

However, beginning with “Song of Salomon” with its awkward chorus of “don’t want no bullshit, just want your sexuality” the album trails off a little bit.  The rest of the songs feel kind of hurried and unspecific; there’s nothing really grabby about them.  They’re not bad, but they’re not all that memorable.  In fact, “Constellation of the Heart” is one of those rare aspects of a Kate disc: a song that sounds really dated.

The one exception to this decline is “Top of the City,” a really nice ballad that features some classic Kate vocals.

Of the remainder, “Big Stripey Lie” has some cool sound effects and lots of weirdness floating around it (and I do quite like it) although it’s really not as substantial as her previous experimental pieces.

Probably the most controversial song on the disc is “Why Should I Love You?” a duet with Prince.  While the main chorus is pretty cool (and uncannily Prince-like) the rest of the track sounds (again) very dated.  The track also features the great comedian Lenny Henry on vocals.  However, since Henry is responsible for what may be the worst sitcom theme song ever in the history of music (it may actually make you want to not watch the rather funny Chef, it is so awful) his inclusion isn’t really all that wonderful.  The disc ends with “You’re the One” a weird (in a good way) track that features The Bulgarian Chorus again.  They seem to do a great job of keeping Kate’s songs focused, so the disc ends on a high note.

This disc is pretty soundly dismissed by even diehard Kate fans.  And it is definitely her least satisfying overall. But if you look deeper into the disc, there are some unfairly overlooked gems.

[READ: November 20, 2009] Symzonia

After reading Etidorhpa, I started looking around at other Hollow Earth books.  And thankfully, someone has done most of the work already. So, for an absurdly long list of Hollow Earth books, check out this link.  I was delighted to see that so many of them are quite short!

When I saw this book, and realized that it was about the world mentioned in “Symmes Hole” (from McSweeney’s) and that it was very likely written by Symmes himself (there is still debate, but it is convincing that he wrote it) I decided to check it out.

Sadly, this book was considerably duller than Etidorhpa.  It was 250 pages and the first 100 were details of his journey to the South Pole.  Which would be fine except that since the author is a sailor he gives excruciating details about not only sailing, but even shipbuilding (including how smart he was for making the ship as strong as he did,) and the directions of the wind and speculation about longitude and all that great seafaring stuff.  That’s not my thing, so I found it rather tedious.

He also talks about the detailed process of claiming the island that he lands on for the United States (the deed that he writes up and where he buries it!).

There’s even a near mutiny.  When they approach the South Pole, they lose all connection to their compass.  No one can figure out where they are except the captain (which actually seems like a flaw for the rest of the crew, but what do I know).  As such, no one can throw the captain overboard or they will be lost at sea.  Anyhow, this was probably the most exciting part of the book.

When they finally do get to the land at the South Pole, there is an opening in the earth which leads to the center world.  Although I can’t exactly tell how they sail into and out of this hole.  There’s a  diagram at the front of the book but it’s not terribly useful.

First they make landfall and create a superb structure (the Captain is clearly a fantastic builder) that allows them to camp in a frigid tundra and to hunt seal.  Well, actually half the crew hunt seal, the rest sail off to the paradise of the land inside the hole.

The ship sails on and the Captain meets the Symzonians.  Unlike in Editorhpa, in Symzonia, there doesn’t appear to be a world in the core of the earth.  Rather, the residents seem to live on the inside edge of the globe itself.

As in Editorhpa, the people inside are enlightened.  But if you imagined that the preachiness was pretty strong there, it’s twice as bad here.  The failings of people on the earth (or Externals) are pretty explicitly detailed.  Chapters are devoted (in more excruciating details) to the Internals’ form of government (including the various levels of government and how they are selected or excluded).  He compares it to the United States government (which has only been in existence for 50 years at this point!), and, of course, he find the U.S. version to be quite lacking.

They even have incredible energy production (vehicles that can go hundreds of miles an hour and stop on a dime), and the best tasting foods with no wasted energy, and everything else that is good and wonderful.  But they are also not interested in material finery: they have unlimited access to oysters, so they have pearls everywhere.  The captain asks for a handful and they give him some since the pearls have no value to them).  Of course, none of the details behind these amazing technological accomplishments are given, ostensibly because the externals couldn’t handle it.

The Internals are quite distrustful of the captain, and they keep him from returning to their land until he can learn their language.  So the ship stays moored until he learns their language and proves himself worthy of them.  In the meantime he gives them all of the literature on the ship (the Internals are, of course, much better at learning English than he is at learning their language).  And they are horrified when they read the fiction that the Captain brought, determining that Externals are basically greedy, selfish bastards bent on war and salves to their impulses.  And, they are likely descendants from the bad apples that they cast out of their Internal world years ago.  They deem him unworthy of staying in their land, and send him on his way.

The captain feels bad that he is not as pure and good as the Internals.  But, mostly he is sad because he was hoping to make a killing on his exploration and all his information (and pearls!) and book deals and everything else.  Which (doh!) goes to show that he ISN’T enlightened, just like they said.

He leaves the center of the earth to go back to the island where the other half of his crew has been hanging out for several months slaughtering seals.  He’s able to load up (and I kid you not) 100,000 seal pelts.  Good grief.

When he returns home he entrusts the wrong man with his massive monetary gain for the seal pelts, and he hits financial trouble, which is what inspired him to write this book.  So it’s kind of meta- in an 1820’s sort of way.

I gave away a lot of the story, but there’s not a lot of story there.  Further, the Table of Contents summarizes each chapter which basically gives away everything that happens.  And if I didn’t mention these parts there wouldn’t be much interesting story left.  Although that’s not entirely true, the plot isn’t really the point of the book.  It is really an opportunity for the author to air his grievances with the fledgling U.S. and point out all of the country’s failings.

Like Etidorhpa, this book was clearly written as a kind of proof that this internal world exists.  Hence all of the matter of fact (and dull) technical aspects of the story.  It also explains the ToC giving everything away, almost like a textbook.  The strangest thing for me though is that the author clearly had an amazing imagination to come up with this, but he seemed to lack the imagination to make the story more compelling.

A lot of this Hollow Earth work is preachy, and I hope that future stories prove more entertaining.

SOUNDTRACK: KATE BUSH-Hounds of Love (1985).

I have a very specific memory of the first time I heard the song  “Hounds of Love.”  I was in high school and the Wilderness Adventure Club was heading towards whatever destination we were going to (funny I can’t remember the destination, but I recall the car trip there).  The head of the club (who was a teacher, but not one I had) was driving a bunch of us in his station wagon and this song came on.  My friend Brad and I howled with laughter at the “barking” that Kate does. “Roo Roo Roo Roo.”

It only occurred to me recently that the driver probably enjoyed the music or else he wouldn’t have had it on, so that wasn’t very nice of us.  It also occurs to me that he must have had the disc (actually the tape, as there were no discs then) because I don’t imagine the song was ever on the radio.  (Although I also think there may have been a DJ talking about the songs, so my memory is shaky).  I just remember laughing and laughing and quite likely Roo Rooing for much of the trip.

So, it’s funny now how much I love this disc (my high school self was a metal head, my college self expanded his musical mind rather a lot).

Kate’s previous two records were a wonderful precursor to this monumental disc.  The big hits come at the top: “Hounds of Love” is indeed an amazing song, as is “Running Up That Hill.”  But they’re familiar enough that I don’t have to say anything.  “The Big Sky” is a rollicking romp of fun.  And “Cloudbusting” is just simply amazing.  (Look for the video with Donald Sutherland!).  It’s five minutes of intense storytelling.

But for me, the second side of the album (starting with track 6 on the disc) is the real selling point.  It’s something of a story called The Ninth Wave.  And what I love about it (in addition to the awesome music) are the amazing effects and sounds and voices that are all over the tracks.

It begins simply with a delicate piece, “And Dream of Sheep,” a beautiful piano ballad.  It’s followed by the mesmerizing “Under Ice.”  The opening string sounds evoke someone skating on an ice (which is what the song is about).  As the tension grows (is someone under the ice?) voices far back in the distance compete with Kate singing “Its me!”

The next track, “Waking the Witch” begins with some awesome headphone voice work.  Voices from various family members implore her to wake up.  Left, right, middle, back.  Then, a voices asks “Can you not see that light over there?”  With a far off voice whispering “over here.”  When the song finally bursts forth, her voice is manipulated in a creepy disjointed way.  Followed by different musical sections with cathedral bells.  All through the track a male authority figure condemns the girl for being a witch.  And as the song ends (with a sample of the helicopter from Pink Floyd’s The Wall she is found guilty.  It’s quite intense.

The intensity slackens somewhat with the mellow “Watching Me Without You.”  But it builds again with the manic intensity of “The Jig of Life” a traditional jig with uilleann pipes in the background and Kate’s vocals over the top.  The song breaks into a very traditional sounding step dance seisiun until Kate starts whispering “I put this moment here” (more of that cool headphone stuff) and the song takes of again.

“Hello Earth” starts as a simple ballad reminiscent of “And Dream of Sheep” but it grows in intensity only to break for a choir passage.  It then returns to the intensity of Kate’s voice which fades and ends with Kate’s whispered:  “Tiefer, tiefer.  Irgendwo in der Tiefe.  Gibt es ein licht.” (Roughly: Deeper Deeper, Somewhere in the depths there is a light.)

The disc ends with “The Morning Fog” a respite from the intensity of the music and the contents.  It’s a light ballad (with amazing fretless bass work) that seems like it could have been used in a John Hughes film.  Especially for the “I tell my mother/father/loved ones/brother how much I love them” lyrics.

The Ninth Wave is one of my favorite suites to listen to.  It not only demands attention, it usually gets it.

Hounds of Love is, simply put, fantastic.

[READ: November 15, 2009] Gemini & The Transfiguration of Benno Blimpie

When I was a kid, watching cartoons on Channel 11, WPIX, there was a frequent, (in my memory it was incessant) commercial for a Broadway play.  And the only things I remember about the commercial were two snippets:  In the first, a young boy is gorging himself on food and his mother yells “TAKE HUMAN BITES!”  The second shows a woman who says “I’m  not hungry, I’ll just pick” who then grabs a handful of spaghetti from someone else’s plate.

This commercial was such a part of our culture, that my friends used to shout “TAKE HUMAN BITES” at each other all the time.  And yet, after all these years, I couldn’t remember what the play was.  So, out of curiosity, I did some searching to see if I could find this mysterious play (and, more importantly find the commercial).

So, thank you, internet, for helping me discover the play is Albert Innaurato’s Gemini.  No commercials have been forthcoming, sadly.

Well, I thought it would be fun to read this play and see if it was as funny as the commercial seemed.  Who could have guessed that the play would have turned out like this?

The play is set in a poor section of Philadelphia.  The cast is: Fran Geminiani, his son Francis, and his lady friend Lucille Pompi.  Their next door neighbors are Bunny Weinberger and her son Herschel.  The entire play is set in the yard that separates the two houses.  The two newcomers that set the play in motion are Randy & Judith Hastings.  They are brother and sister and go to Harvard with Francis.

Francis is a somewhat overweight, very insecure, very Italian kid.  Fran, his dad, is pretty close to an Italian working-class stereotype, with the pasta making and the boisterousness.  The basic plot is that Judith, a beautiful WASP, has fallen in love with Francis.  She and Randy hitchhike to Philly complete with camping gear.  They plan to sleep in Francis’ yard for a couple days (you know, crazy college kids).

Francis is very uncomfortable about their arrival.  He tells them that his dad is a Mafia guy and kills WASPs on sight.  (This freaks out Randy but not Judith, who is his intended target).  When that doesn’t work, he ultimately rebuffs her advances by telling her that he’s queer.  She doesn’t believe him after what they did at school before the summer started (and she is even more disbelieving when he reveals who he’s got a crush on).

The rest of the story, and arguably the real heart of the story, focuses on the interactions in the neighborhood.  Fran and Bunny have lived next to each other for many years.  Bunny is a loud, obnoxious Irish woman who married a Jew (there’s a lengthy monologue about that).  Her son Herschel is an overweight, asthmatic loser who she says is a genius, even though at 16 he rides a tricycle around the yard making trolley sounds, and collects Public Transportation paraphernalia.

Bunny is abusive to everyone, including her son (one stage direction states that she “beats the shit out of Herschel”).  She sings songs loudly on an out of tune piano and flirts aggressively with Fran and then Randy (a stage direction states that she grabs his crotch).  She is also due for a court date because she assaulted a woman who caught her (Bunny) in bed with the woman’s  husband (in the woman’s house).

The action of the play takes place over a 24 hour period.  In in that short span of time we are treated to attempted suicide, drug use, homosexuality, train schedules, and a near-crushing by a piano.  It’s quite a feat.

The story is pretty funny (although I must say that the commercial was much funnier than reading the lines in print).  But the strange thing about the play is that there are absolutely no likable characters (except maybe Randy, as he seems an innocent victim).  Fran and Bunny are loud and boorish.  Lucille is lazy.  Francis is insecure.  Herschel is an annoying hanger-on.  Even Judith gets into the mean-spirited act when Francis turns her down.

And yet, there is something starnegly endearing about the whole group of them.  And as a slice of life play, it’s very entertaining.  The characters are (despite the stereotypical ideas) well rounded and amusing.  And the scenes have the potential (when performed) to be over the top hilarious.  The play itself is only about 70 pages, and it’s a brisk read.  But as with most plays, I’m sure seeing it is better than reading it.

I just wish I could see the commercial again.  If anyone knows where it might be available, do pass it on!

The other play that comes with the book is The Transformation of Benno Blimpie. It’s only 30 pages (it’s a one act play).  If you thought the characters in Gemini were unpleasant, you have seen nothing yet.  The set-up of this play is that Benno, a very fat twenty-year old, has locked himself in a room and plans to eat himself to death.

The entirety of the play is Benno’s (biased) memory of events.  And the play is set up so that he never physically leaves his room, but he interacts with the other characters as if he were in the room with them.  (Which I’ll bet is a very cool device on stage).

Benno’s flashbacks concern his parents and his grandfather.  His father is a former athlete and is something of a non-entity in the house.  His mother is a mean, horrible woman who never fails to insult Benno about his weight or his complexion or about how miserable her life has been since she had him.  (Her very first scene is quite shocking!).  The only charterer who is at all nice to him is his grandfather.

And yet, as Benno flashes back, his grandfather becoming sexually involved with a 13 year-old Catholic school girl.  (She encourages him to do things to her, and tries to get money out of him).  And, when she turns him down when he tries to do “more” with her, he takes his frustrations out on Benno just like everyone else.

Benno basically went through life being mocked and abused by everyone.  His only joy was in art.  But the art he made wasn’t appreciated by anyone.  So his only love has also let him down.  His last recourse is to simply to eat himself to death.

This play is shocking on many levels.  And all of the characters are reprehensible.  I’m not even entirely sure that I would want to see it performed (it lacks even the grim humor of Gemini).

I didn’t know a thing about Innaurato, so I looked him up and discovered that Gemini ran on Broadway for 1,819 performances and earned him an Obie Award.  It was also made into the film Happy Birthday, Gemini. starring Madeline Kahn and Rita Moreno.  Benno Blimpie also earned him an Obie.  Wow.

While looking around I found some clips from the movie Happy Birthday, Gemini.  And I have to admit that watching the clips leads me to think that if done well, both of the plays would be quite funny despite how disturbing they are.  I also wonder, if I find these stories shocking now, how shocking they must have been in 1978!  Francis’ homosexuality is accepted without any dismay, as is the drug use (there’s some very funny sequences about the pot smoing).  Even Benno’s grandfather’s pedophilia is sort of dismissed (although I think that, awful as it sounds, pedophilia was seen as less horrible in the 70s…can that be right?  I mean the whole Jodie Foster/Taxi Driver thing.)

Anyhow, these plays are not for the weak-hearted.  And I wonder if a revival of Gemini would be viable now.  (Although, interestingly, there is now Gemini The Musical.  I can’t wait to see what that’s all about!  Actually, I want to hear the music!)

The two movie clips are shared below.  Madeline Kahn is Bunny and she is hilarious (although she is cast completely against what Bunny looks like in theplay).  And, I think Francis is also a good looking athletic guy in the movie, too  (Innaurato didn’t have anything to do with the movie).  The clips are quite funny.  Sadly neither one features my favorite lines.  The movie is available only on VHS as far as I can tell.

Here’s one of the pot smoking scenes:

This is the suicide scene:

SOUNDTRACK: KATE BUSH-Lionheart (1978).

Something about the late 70s seemed to make artists very prolific (perhaps it was studio pressure to capitalize on an artist’s success, hmmm?) Here’s Kate Bush’s 2nd record in about 10 months.

And, yea, the cover shows off her budding theatricality (the tour that accompanied these albums (which is available on DVD) is crazy for the performance art).

There are some great tracks on the disc, although for the most part it feels like it was kind of rushed.  But despite that sense, there are some things that Bush introduced on this record that would remain with her throughout her career.  Her voice is layered a lot more (although it is still unbelievably high–the opening words of  “Symphony in Blue” are rather astonishing.)

She has also developed a wonderful ethereal sound.  Unlike new age artists whose ethereal style is without substance, Kate is definitely grounded (somewhere).  A song like “In Search of Peter Pan” with its twinkling pianos is absolutely suited to the fantasy she evokes (and when the chorus comes around, the real sense of foreboding in Peter Pan kicks in.  (So, yes, she may be out there, but she certainly knows what she’s doing).

And there’s the rather clever underpinnings of the seemingly trivial song “Wow.”  It’s another song where a sinister musical basis lurks underneath the seemingly silly chorus: “Wow wow wow wow wow, unbelievable” (which is actually pretty snarky in context).  But really it’s the cool vocals tricks (the deep almost subliminal “uh-huh” for instance) that introduces something new, and intriguing, and something she would explore more on later releases.

This is followed by the rocking (in Kate terms) “Don’t Push Your Foot on the Heartbrake.”  It has some pretty aggressive guitar in it which is matched with delay and echo.  It’s another element that foreshadows the kinds of sounds she would use extensively on future discs  (oh, and she really gets a good banshee wail later in the song).

And, of course, the final track “Hammer Horror” is fantastic, with a great sense of theatricality, befitting the song’s inspiration.

It’s Kate next album that blows me away every time, but I am still fond of these first two.

[November 5, 2009] North World

I really enjoyed the premise of this graphic novel.  The main character Conrad is a sword wielder straight out of Dungeons & Dragons (there’s even a panel which shows the same characteristics that you roll for in the game: Str–7, Agl–5, Stm–8 etc.).  He is a low level fighter (but he’s quite good and has defeated some huge animals) but he is seeking glory, fame and minstrels singing heroic songs about him.

And yet he dresses like a contemporary guy (button down shirt and jeans) and clearly lives in a twenty-first century world.

He is called by the guildmaster to go to Coeur de Lac and fight a demon summoner (his biggest adversary yet, and his best chance to prove himself). It turns out that Coeur de Lac is where he grew up and where he left 7 years ago with no intention of returning.  He had also just received an invitation to his ex girlfriend’s wedding.  And so, like a sort of Dungeons and Dragons-flavored Gross Pointe Blank, he returns home with a hit job to do, but mayhaps he’ll take in a wedding while he’s there.

The story was quite interesting.  There were some fun twists and turns and some intriguing character developments.  And the one time I was about to accuse the story of being maudlin and a little overly sentimental, Brown absolves himself by showing that Conrad had fallen under a spell rather than just being overly emotional.  Nicely played.

One problem I had with the book was that it was set up for a sequel (so the rather simple story line doesn’t end in the book.  That bugs me, but I’ll get over it.

The real problem I had was with the art work.  The art was very simple and it worked pretty well for much of the time.  Buildings, nature, backgrounds etc were quite good.  The cover art was really cool and compelling in that indie style that I like a lot.  But the faces of the characters within the story conveyed emotions that were not appropriated for what they were saying.  It seemed like simply poor drawing to make the characters seem angry when they weren’t (that was a common complaint).  And there were other times when the facial expression just didn’t seem right.  So it built up a false sense of emotion that I expected would pay off in someway, but which never did.  It felt like some kind of underlying/subliminal tension that wasn’t there.  It was just ineffectual artwork.  And that’s kind of a shame.

But that wasn’t enough to keep me from really enjoying the story.  And I’ll certainly be getting volume 2 soon.

SOUNDTRACK: DANKO JONES-Never Too Loud [US edition bonus tracks] (2009).

I reviewed this disc a few posts ago.   Since then the disc has finally been released in the States.  And, naturally, since I bought the import version there are three bonus tracks added on this one.  The three tracks are “My Problems (Are Your Problems Now);” “Sugar High”; “R.I.P. RFTC”

The tracks aren’t radically different from the rest of the disc.  However, the first track is notable for having a lot of backing vocals (yeah yeahs and other things).  It’s a bit weird.  As is the fact that the song sounds less bass heavy than most of their other songs–it’s still loud, but it seems a bit tinny.

The second track “Sugar High” sounds like Danko for a kids show.  In just about every other song I’ve ever heard that was about “sugar,” the sugar was a metaphor for sex.  And yet, this song’s chorus quite proudly proclaims, “ice cream cakes and candy cars, I’m the kind of guy who likes a sugar high” and “cotton candy and caramel I’m that type of guy.”  It’s almost too comical to be considered a real song, and yet it rocks really hard.  Some cartoon absolutely needs to use this song in its soundtrack.

The final song is about Rocket From the Crypt, obviously.  It’s also the first Danko song where I’ve had a hard time deciphering all of the lyrics.  But, suffice it to say that it’s a blistering fast track about the sad news that RFTC broke up.

Just three more interesting reasons to track down the CD now that it’s available in the States.

[READ: November 6, 2009] The Apocalipstix

The premise of this graphic novel is that a nuclear explosion has hit the U.S.  Our heroines are a kick-ass band comprised of three women (like Josie and the Pussy cats only really bad ass).  And despite the global destruction, they are still going to play their gigs.  Call it the “End of the World Tour.”

The main characters are: Mandy, a bad-ass black woman on guitar and vocals; Dot, a rather sweet (until she’s pushed) blonde bombshell on bass, and Megumi, a Japanese cowgirl (!) on drums who is mostly silent (she speaks Japanese) but who is very intense.

There are three short stories in this volume.  In the first, the girls fight in a Mad Max-inspired road battle against the thugs who stole their equipment (here’s where we see Dot’s wicked streak come out–when someone touches her bass).  The thugs lead them to the King of the region–how will he treat our heroines?

The second is a comic interlude in which the girls’ picnic is invaded by gigantic mutated ants.

The third is a battle of the bands.  In a Thunderdome-like setting, musicians from all over have come for the grand prize: gas!  The winner gets it all and, the losers have to walk.  Each of the ladies makes an acquaintance in the story (naturally with the men from the main competition in the contest–Hemageddon).  Until…  Well, the story sort of ends unresolved because of an upcoming sequel.

The sequel promises a drive to California.

So the book was fun.  It was a nice twist on the Mad Max style story (perhaps Tank Girl is a better reference?)  There was some good humor, so funny conceits and some rocking scenes (not too much in the way of lyrics to comment on, though).

The art work was one the best things about the book.  The style was great: strong lines, really effective scenes of motion and very expressive individual characters.  And the characters are so well drawn (and of course, they’re super hot) that you actually care about what happens to them.

I’m really looking forward to the next volume.

SOUNDTRACK: POSSESSED-Seven Churches (1985).

Back in high school I was really into heavy metal.  And I got into something of a contest to find the heaviest, scariest metal bands around.  (To counter the guy in class who was into Stryper, naturally).  Well, I think I hit the jackpot with this album.

This is brutally fast speed metal.  Growling vocals, staccato super fast drums and a general sense of doom.

The song titles tell it all: “Burning in Hell,” “Holy Hell,” “Pentagram,” “Satan’s Curse” and “Death Metal.”  Allmusic.com states that this is the first death metal album.  So, how about that?

At this point, though, I think it is most notable for featuring Larry LaLonde on guitars.

LaLonde went on to be the guitarist for Primus for many many years.  So, he turned in his upside down cross and fake blood for purple hair and an alternative rock gig.

And I’ve got the pictures to prove it.

[READ: November 3, 2009] Black Metal

This graphic novel comes from the beloved Oni Press.  It’s the story of the brothers Stronghand, adopted siblings who live and breathe black metal.  They are notoriously evil and their past precedes them. They have been to five schools in four years and, as the story starts, we see them on their first day at Ronald Reagan Jr High.  (Which at first I thought was actually “Ronald Reagan Junior” High School, which would have been even more hilarious.)

By lunchtime, they have intimidated everyone with their black metal stares.  But, when someone questions their manhood, they strike back and are instantly expelled.

It’s then that we meet their adoptive family: a super sweet blonde woman and her natural child: a booger-eating sweetly babbling toddler.

While they were at school, one of the brothers saw a girl wearing a Frost Axe shirt.  Frost Axe is, of course, a seriously heavy black metal band from Norway.  They track down the album and it blows their mind.  Lyrically, it’s about the story of a magical sword forged by The Roth, which was used in an epic battle in Hell.

When they play the album backwards, they are given a chance to pull the sword from Hell’s stone.  The rest is history.

This only gets through to about half of the story.  The rest is battles, intrigues, secrets raveled and, of course, and epic meeting with Hell’s demons and with Frost Axe themselves.

The story was fun for its epic storytelling style and adherence to Norwegian black metal’s mythic stories.  It’s also got all kinds of funny (and often juvenile) humor.  But it is rated T for teen, so it’s never too too raunchy.

The art is wonderfully dark and sinister.  The brothers Stronghand have a weird Asian/Native/Central American appearance (yeah, that’s an unlikely mix, but it works) which helps them stand out from the rest of the WASPy kids.  The demons and hellpit stuff is also pretty cool with plenty of light areas to counterpoint the darkness.

Occasionally, I found it hard to tell the characters apart. Sam and Shawn look enough alike that it’s not always clear who is who (which may even be the point).  And when the Frost Axe girl enters the picture (with the same haircut and general appearance) let’s just say there are times in battle scenes where I have no idea who is doing what. But that’s not really a big deal.

Of course, when the story reaches its end, we get a very ominous To Be Continued….  I don’t mind sequels, but I don’t like when a story is so clearly set up for a sequel that it doesn’t finish itself.  Fortunately, this story doesn’t do that.  It wraps itself up very nicely and then preps us all for the next stage of the saga.  Which is alright by me. And which I’m looking forward to.

If you like your metal black, you’ll enjoy this book.

And my word count is now 666.